Saturday, May 01, 2010

Mississippi larnin'

Ah yes, in a successful effort to make themselves look as stupid and petty as possible the Wesson Attendance Center and the Copiah County School District out of the great state of Mississippi has taken on one of their own honor society students. Ceara Sturgis, Honor Society member and 2010 Graduate, wanted to wear a tuxedo in her graduation portrait for the yearbook, and the school was "uncomfortable" with that wish and so to teach Ceara a lesson (they are, after all, a school) they completely removed her photograph from the grad portrait section of the yearbook. There are other photos of Ceara in the yearbook, including one of her in her tuxedo on a page paid for by her family, but there is no acknowledgment of her in the grad portraits. Plenty of room for the druggies and the drop-outs, but no room for Ceara.

Copiah County School District spokesperson, Martha Traxler, had no comment on the story although an appropriate comment from the District members would probably have run along the lines of, "Yep, we're a bunch of world-class a-holes. No doubt about it!" In fact I am confident that is exactly what they would have said were they capable of mouth sounds more sophisticated than, "Ghnnnnnnnn." Still, there is hope that one day all these folks will be gone and normal people will take their places. In the meantime the Mississippi ACLU has yet to decide whether they will sue the crap out of the District on Ceara's behalf.

Mississippi is also the great state where the Itawamba County Agricultural High School actually cancelled the senior prom because Constance McMillan wanted to attend with her girlfriend. Well they certainly showed her, by jingo! But bizarrely, or Mississippily enough the story doesn't end there. In late April Constance and her date were invited to a senior prom at a local country club in Fulton, Mississippi. It turned out to be a "fake" prom with only Constance, her date, and five other unpopular students invited. All the other "good" students had gone off to another prom where they wouldn't be distracted by "undesirables" and they could just get on with line-dancing and farm-animal molesting (I understand the chickens were very popular this year.)

So, who were the utterly clever people who planned this totally hyuu-larious turn of events? Why it was the parents of the other students! What a great and hardly slimy at all bunch of folks. Teaching their kids that if someone is different it is okay to dump on them and hey, maybe bully them up a bit. After all, lying is a good thing and chickens are finger lickin' good! One actually valuable lesson they missed but probably really could have used though could have been taught to them by Constance, had she not been having a good time at the "fake" prom, and that is how to be a good person. Something that there is no way in hell their parents will ever be able to teach. I swear, Constance has more class in her little finger than anyone else in that town has in their entire body.

I think the final question is, what is the matter with so many of the people in Mississippi? It seems that if you don't want to toe the party line and be a clone along with everybody else you are not welcome. Hanging ten with those biblically based values certainly makes it easier, what with not having to think or anything, and it beats having a mind of your own, I guess. Just to be on the safe side though I think I would want the water checked if I lived there. There is something seriously wrong with people who do these sorts of things. Seriously wrong.

Anyway... Humouroceros



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