Wednesday, September 19, 2007


Recently a ‘spinner’ in New York (a ‘spinner’ is one of those folk who exercise by using stationary bikes in a class. As I understand it there is a leader and the bikes have variable tensions so that it is as if you are actually out in the fresh air riding a bike. Personally I’m not down with spinning, but then I live in paradise and if I want to ride my bike in the fresh air I just go do it. I suspect that the air is a little fresher here than it is in New York) had a fit and threw one of his fellow spinners into a wall. This fellow spinner had been “hooting and grunting” to increase the “euphoric experience” of spinning and Mr. Christopher Carter got annoyed. He yelled that the other guy should “shut up” and was told, “This is a spin class. If you don’t like it, leave.”

Mr. Carter fell into a blinding rage and rather than leaving, he tossed his fellow spinner (a Mr. Stuart Sugarman) into the wall, where he suffered a back injury that required surgery. Apparently Mr. Carter feels that he is the victim here and claims that it was a simple case of “spin-rage”.

Okay, to this guy Sugarman was getting into it a bit too much and this annoyed Carter who decided that rather than being an adult, he would throw a tantrum. Whatever. Charge the freak with assault and there you go. But no, instead they come up with an entirely new way to abuse the word ‘rage’ and by gosh golly who’s the victim here after all?

In my opinion, we all are. I am just a little tired of any creep who is incapable of controlling himself, just flying off the handle then claiming whatever-rage. I don’t care if it’s ‘road-rage’, ‘air-rage’, ‘standing-too-long-in-the-line-at-the-store-rage’, or whatever. The fact is that these people are just creeps. Why don’t we treat them as such and just get on with it? Toss them in a big rubber room with a rattle and be sure that they never have any reason at all to complain. I suggest sealing up the room and checking on them every five or ten years, just to be sure that everything is okay.

Now I am not getting on at Mr. Carter. I notice that he is younger that I am, and I am forced to wonder if he is one of those people who played on soccer teams where there was no score kept and everybody got a trophy. Naturally he would have a sense of entitlement and no doubt when he politely told that noisy guy Sugarman to “shut up” he probably couldn’t understand why Sugarman didn’t instantly comply. Ol’ Chris Carter seems to be a real-life analog of “South Park”s character Cartman, so naturally he flew into a rage. Under those circumstances, who wouldn’t? But rather than calling it ‘spinner-rage’ shouldn’t it be called ‘stupid-whiney-bastard-rage’? Just a thought.

Anyway… Humouroceros.


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